Osho – Just giving and giving and giving is insulting and humiliating

Osho – I have a friend in Jabalpur, who is the richest man in that state, and the biggest manufacturer of beedies in the whole world. He used to come here, he used to come to my camps, and then he became a minister. Then he started becoming afraid of me. All politicians are afraid of me — and I am not even going to touch them; they are untouchables to me! They are unnecessarily afraid.

But I can understand their fear. Anybody coming to me will lose his votes. The public, the crowd, is not going to support him if they see him entering the Gateless Gate. Since he became a minister he disappeared. Otherwise he used to travel with me ….

Once, traveling in an air-conditioned coach, he told me his heart, which was troubling him very much. He had been seeing me for years and he had never told me. People don’t want to share their misery, they hide it. They cover their wounds, and by covering the wounds they create cancers.

But sometimes it happens, particularly in railway trains or in airplanes, people become more intimate. Strange … even with strangers, you don’t know who the person is — the next station he will get down and perhaps you will never see him again — and you start telling him your most secret things you have not told even your wife, not even your mistress!

He told me, “I have been suffering from one thing, and I cannot find any solution. Perhaps you can be of some help.”
I said, “Open your heart, just let me see the wound. Tell me what the problem is.”

He said, “The problem is that I was born in a poor family, then I was adopted by a super-rich family because they had no son. I was a faraway relative, but seeing possibilities they adopted me, they educated me. Now they are dead, and I am the sole owner of a great empire. Because I have so much money, I have raised my old family also to be very rich, my brothers, my cousin-brothers, my friends. The people I knew I have helped as much as possible. Whatever they wanted … they all have beautiful cars, they all have beautiful houses, they have beautiful businesses, very prosperous, because I have so much.

“But one thing is strange: they are all against me. Even if I am sick, nobody comes to see me. It hurts me very much. I have done everything in my power to help them and they have all turned their backs on me.”
I said, “It is not a difficult problem. It is very simple. Have you ever received anything from them?”
He said, “No, I don’t need to.”

I said, “That is not the problem. By giving to them, you have insulted them. You don’t understand the subtle psychology. By giving to them — always giving, a one-way traffic — you have never allowed simple things. You could have asked one of your friends to whom you have given millions of rupees, `I was passing by the side of your house and I saw such beautiful roses. Can you bring a few to me? I will be so grateful.’ And immediately that man would have become your friend. He can also give something to you. He can be equal.

“When you were sick, you could have phoned anybody whom you have helped: `I am feeling very sick and I have been remembering you so much. You must be busy, but find just five minutes to come and sit by my side. One never knows whether I will survive or not ….’ That man would have come, putting everything aside, and would have felt immensely friendly towards you because you remembered him, you called him in your deepest moment of need — only him and nobody else. He would have felt so gratified.

“But you have never done that. Just giving and giving and giving is insulting and humiliating. Your ego, your pride — this is your unconsciousness. You thought you were doing great service to your friends and family and acquaintances, but why have they all become your enemies if the service was so great? They have seen in your eyes that you give, but you give from a very high superiority. They are all inferiors, receivers.”

He said, “I never thought about it.”
I said, “This is the state of the whole of humanity — the unconscious humanity. They never understand that receiving is far greater, it needs a far greater heart than giving. Anybody can give. For receiving you need such a consciousness that cannot be humiliated. You need such greatness of being that `Who can insult me?'”

Source – Osho Book “Christianity: The Deadliest Poison and Zen: The Antidote to All Poisons”