Osho : Go beyond mind; reach to a level of no-mind. Then love flowers, but that love has no opposite to it. Beyond mind there is no opposite to anything. Beyond mind everything is one. Within mind, everything is divided into two. But if you are within mind, it is better to be authentic than to be false.
So be authentic when you feel angry toward your lover or your beloved. Be authentic while you are in anger, and then with no repression, when the moment of love will come, when the mind will move to the other extreme, you will have a spontaneous flow. So with mind, take fighting as part of it. It is the very dynamism of the mind to work in polar opposites. So be authentic in your anger, be authentic in your fight; then you will be authentic in your love also.
So for lovers, I would like to say: be authentic. And if you are really authentic, a unique phenomenon will happen. You will become weary of the whole nonsense of moving in polar opposites. But be authentic; otherwise you will never become weary.
A repressed mind never becomes really aware that he is gripped in polar opposites. He is never really angry, he is never really in love, so he has no real experience of the mind. Thus, I suggest to be authentic. Do not be false. BE REAL! And authenticity has its own beauty. Your lover, your beloved will understand when you are really angry – authentically angry. Only a fake anger or a false non-anger cannot be forgiven. Only a false face cannot be forgiven.
Be authentic, and then you will be authentic in love also. That authentic love will compensate, and through this authentic living you will become wearied. You will come to wonder what you are doing – why you are just a pendulum moving from one pole to another. You will be bored, and then only can you decide to move beyond mind and beyond polarity.
Be an authentic man or be an authentic woman. Do not allow any falsity; do not pretend. Be real and suffer reality. Suffering is good. Suffering is really a training, a discipline. Suffer it! Suffer anger and suffer love and suffer hate. Remember only one thing: never be false. If you do not feel love, then say that you do not feel love. Do not pretend; do not try to show that you are loving. If you are angry, then say that you are angry and be angry.
There will be much suffering, but suffer it. Through that suffering a new consciousness is born. You become aware of the whole nonsense of hate and love. You hate the person and you also love the same person, and you go on moving in a circle. That circle will become crystal clear for you, and it becomes crystal clear only through suffering.
Do not escape suffering. You need a REAL suffering. It is like a fire: it will burn you. All that is false will burn and all that is real will be there. This is what existentialists call authenticity. Be authentic, and then you cannot be anymore in the mind. Be non-authentic, and you will be for lives and lives in the mind.
You will get bored of the duality. But how can one get bored of the duality unless one is really in the duality, not pretending? Then you will know that the so-called love of the mind is nothing but a disease. Have you observed that a lover cannot sleep? He is not at ease – he is feverish. If you examine him, he will show many symptoms of many diseases. This love, the so-called love of mind and body, is really a disease, but one remains occupied – that is the function of it.
Otherwise you will feel unoccupied, as if you are not doing anything in this world. Your whole life will seem vacant, so love is good to fill it. Mind itself is the disease, so whatsoever belongs to the mind is going to be a disease. Only beyond mind, where you are not divided in duality, where you are one, only there does a different love flower. Jesus calls it love. Buddha calls it compassion. This is just to make a distinction. It makes no difference what you call it.
There is a possibility of a love which has no opposite to it, but that love can come only when you go beyond this love. And to go beyond, I suggest that you be authentic. To be authentic – in hate, in love, in anger. In everything, be authentic, real, not pretending, because only a reality can be transcended. You cannot transcend unreal things.