Osho on Pseudo Masters and Fake Gurus

Osho – One thing about the pseudo master is that he manages a facade, he wears a mask. He wears a mask that you would like him to wear. He fulfills your expectations. The true master never fulfills anybody’s expectations. Jesus proved that he was a true master because at the last moment he frustrated everybody, even his closest disciples. They were hoping that he would do some miracle: “If he can raise people from death, if he can cure blind people, if he can cure crippled persons, he is going to do something when he will be crucified.

Some great miracle is going to happen….” And nothing happened, nothing at all! That proves his authenticity. He was not there to fulfill your expectations. But the pseudo master always tries to fulfill your expectations. Sometimes he manages beautifully. Sometimes he will do miracles. I know one man. He told his story to me himself because he fell in love with me.

He was worshipped by many as enlightened. By and by he became tired of playing the role. It is tiring. When you are not enlightened and you have to pretend to be enlightened and you have even to manage a few miracles, it is tiring. He came to see me. He cried and wept and he said, “Save me from my followers! I am utterly tired and bored, and I have to do things just to keep them satisfied.” He said to me, “Once I had to do a miracle because my followers were expecting something big so that many more people can come.”

Followers are also interested that if many more people come to THEIR master, they feel that they are with the right person. If they are alone with the master, then they start feeling a little doubtful. Nobody believes in his own being, nobody trusts in his own intelligence. When you see thousands of people you say, “It must be right. So many people can’t be wrong.” Remember, the reality is just the opposite: so many people can’t be right!

The man said to me, “I had to manage a miracle. I stopped a train for seven minutes.”
I said, “How did you manage it?”

He said, “Simple! I had to bribe three persons. One was the ticket collector. I had managed it that I would be traveling without the ticket and he would come and ask for the ticket. And I would get angry and I would say, ‘There is no need for any ticket for me. We are saints and we are allowed every freedom.’ So I became very angry. When I became angry, he became angry — he was bribed and he was told to become very angry.” He pushed the man outside the railway compartment.

This man was traveling with a big group of his followers; almost half of the train was full of his followers. They all got down, and the man said, “Okay, then try to take your train. I will not allow it to move a single inch” — and he stood there with rolled-up eyes. And the driver tried, and the guard was showing the flag and the stationmaster was showing the flag, and nothing was happening. The train was stuck because the driver was bribed, the guard was bribed. Three persons were bribed.

Finally they rushed to him, fell at his feet, asked to be forgiven, asked him to come in again and told him, “Nobody will ever again ask you for the ticket. We are stupid people — forgive us!”

He entered the train and immediately it moved. That created a great sensation. Thousands of people became his followers because he managed to do this miracle.

All miracles are done in this way. If you want to do miracles, you can come in private to me and I will teach you — because these tricks cannot be taught publicly! Once you know, everybody knows; then they lose their whole mystery. All these tricks are done in this way. But people’s expectations are fulfilled.

The pseudo masters speak the language of your desires. They say, “If you meditate, you will become rich, you will become successful.” That is absolute nonsense. Maharishi Mahesh Yogi says to people, “If you meditate you will become healthy, you will become rich, you will become successful, you will become famous. In whatsoever line you are working you will be at the top.”

That’s what you want, so you say, “Okay, then it is not much of a problem to meditate. Fifteen minutes in the morning, fifteen minutes in the evening…” just half an hour lost and all success is yours. This is the most successful formula for success — and you want to succeed. You want a thousand and one desires to be fulfilled.

Now, there are masters who say, “Whatsoever you want, you will get it through meditation. Money will pour in. Just ask in deep meditation and it is going to happen.” This is speaking the language of your desire. The truth is just the opposite. If you ask me, if you really meditate you will be a failure in life, an utter failure. If you are succeeding, even that success will disappear because meditation will make you so relaxed, so nonviolent, so loving, so noncompetitive, so nonegoistic, that who cares for success? Meditation will make you so joyous that who wants to bother about the tomorrow? Who wants to stake today for the tomorrow?

Meditation will make you inwardly rich, certainly. Inwardly you will become ecstatic, but outwardly it can’t be guaranteed that you will become rich, that you will become successful, that you will become very healthy, that no disease will ever happen to you. That is all sheer bullshit!

Maharshi Raman died of cancer, Ramakrishna Paramahansa died of cancer. Can you find greater meditators? J. Krishnamurti suffers from many illnesses; he has been suffering from severe headache for almost twenty years. The headache is so severe that sometimes he wants to hit his head against the wall. Can you find a greater meditator? Can you find a greater buddha alive?

If J. Krishnamurti suffers from a headache, if Raman Maharshi dies of cancer, if Ramakrishna dies of cancer, do you think meditation is going to give you health? Yes, in a way it will make you more healthy and more whole, but only in a very inner way. Deep down you will be whole, deep down there will be an inner spiritual health. Raman is dying with cancer, but his eyes are full of joy. He dies laughing. This is real health. In deep agony is his body, but he is just a witness. This is meditation.

Source: from Osho Book “Dhammapada vol 9”